Untold Stories
by rainbowstarwishes
Summary: One-shot Shinigami!Karin AU Collaboration with Deathwonderwish


BLEACH © Kubo Tite

Collaboration with Deathwonderwish

* * *

Sometimes when I look back at the things I did, at times, I regret them, but at others, I don't. I've lived for quite a long time, and maybe it is finally time to actually tell others about it. Because those people deserve an explanation.

My name is Kurosaki Karin and I used to be known as a Shiba. For some people, I'm known as a human, a normal child living in a 'not so normal' household. But for others, they know me as a motherless child who lost her mother at a young age, Kurosaki Ichigo's younger sister, Kurosaki Yuzu's twin sister or Kurosaki Isshin's youngest child.

But the truth is I never was a human, to begin with, and I'm not even blood related with my siblings. I'm a shinigami, a soul. I was from one of the lowest districts of the Rukongai, where constant crimes took place and I had to steal to survive. I can't say that I'm proud of that period of my life. In fact, I tried my best to forget those times I killed someone in cold blood.

I got saved one day by a shinigami, he said that he was a captain. He didn't act like an important person at all but I could tell that he was powerful. He told me that if I wanted a better life I should go to the shinigami academy and become one of them. So I listened to his advice and went to school for shinigamis. I passed the entrance test with flying colors, and they placed me in an advanced class. Back then I was small, I was younger than everyone and they all seemed taller than me. Even though I was young, it didn't take me long to graduate from the academy and Isshin, the man who saved me took me in his squad, 10th. I was soon known as a child prodigy.

I quickly climbed the ranks and became a seated officer. And one day, Captain Shiba said that he wanted to adopt me. He was lazy, like the lieutenant Matsumoto and they never did paperwork like they were supposed to do but they were good people. They were strong and I respected them. So I accepted his offer and from then on I became a Shiba, I was proud to call him my father even though sometimes he can be a little annoying in the mornings.

* * *

A few years later I mastered my bankai, and I got promoted into the lieutenant of the 6th when Kuchiki Byakuya became the captain. To be honest, I was glad I became his lieutenant because he was like a mentor to me. We met through my father who was a student of Captain Kuchiki's grandfather, Kuchiki Ginrei who was once a captain before him. From what I heard, people thought it was weird (to me I thought it was amusing) because they are polar opposites. My father is lazy, loud and expressive, whilst Kuchiki Ginrei is dedicated, quiet and doesn't show much emotion. My father introduced me to his teacher and his grandson when we visited them for afternoon tea.

The first time I met Captain Kuchiki, I thought he was calm and had a lot of pride inside of him. When we were having tea together, my father suddenly asked his mentor to train me. I was confused about why he asked that then realised it's because I don't have a sparring partner who could take my father's place whenever he is busy. But he declined, instead, he asked his grandson to train me for some reason. So, Captain Kuchiki agreed to train me and since then, we began to train together at his manor. He even helped me to master my bankai. We sometimes get a visit from Captain Shihoin (or 'cat monster' that Captain Kuchiki prefers to call her), who often likes to rile him up. It's surprising how short-tempered he is. Now looking back, I wonder if Captain Kuchiki's grandfather knew I was going to be his lieutenant.

Even after I transferred to the 6th, I still visited the 10th regularly because that was my home. And it would always be my home and all my closest friends are. My position was taken by a boy who looked about my age. He was also a prodigy recently graduated from the academy. Apparently, lieutenant Matsumoto was the one who found him leaking reiatsu. His name was Toshiro, Hitsugaya Toshiro, white-haired and teal eyes. He was the owner of the strongest ice zanpakuto. With my regular visits, we became good friends when we realised that we had a lot in common. We told each other about our childhood. I could always count on him when I needed someone. He was cold towards many people and I could understand why. He didn't like being treated as a child. And I could understand him because we were the same. He wasn't really that cold towards me though. I thought that it was because I could understand him. And I'm happy that he smiled with me and acted like a normal child around me.

When I was transferred to the 6th I've met some new people. Including Rukia, my captain's adopted sister. We got along well because we were really similar. Thanks to her, I met a lot of new friends like Renji, Kira, Toshiro's childhood friend and sister Hinamori.

* * *

I was really happy with my life until one day my father left for a mission that was originally meant for me. It was one in the human world that killed many of his squad members and I was sent to investigate. But my father didn't let me go and went himself. I patiently waited for his return but he never came back. He disappeared, and I was sent again to investigate his disappearance. Before I left, I promised Toshiro and Matsumoto-san that I'd bring their captain back, but somehow I broke the promise because of my selfish reasons.

As I arrived at the human world I couldn't feel Isshin's reiatsu at all, like his existence disappeared altogether. Or worse he was dead. I looked everywhere for him and for several years I couldn't find him. 3 years of searching, I finally lost hope and was about to report his death, when a man named Urahara gave me the answer that I had been looking for. He told me where I could find my father. And I went to look for him only to later find out that he got married… to a Quincy, he lost his shinigami powers because of an incident involving said Quincy.

Isshin and the Quincy whose name was Masaki invited me into the little clinic that they opened and they explained everything to me. They also offered me to stay with them. I didn't deny because being there felt like having a normal family again. Isshin had always treated me like a daughter even before he adopted me and Masaki was so nice to me.

A few years later they had their first child. A healthy boy, they named him Ichigo, he had orange hair like his mother and we could all feel the power in him. He would be powerful if he was a shinigami.

As I watched how happy they were, I felt kind of left out. I really care for Ichigo, it was great watching him growing up little by little. And one day I realised something. He shouldn't know about me so I ended up leaving them. Of course, I told them that I was going to train because going back to Soul Society wasn't a good idea.

I went back to the place I called home for a while and realised that I've already lost so much. Masaki had died, from a hollow while protecting Ichigo as my father explained to me. Before she died, they had another child, this time a girl they named Yuzu. Yuzu was young and looked a lot around my age. So with the help of Urahara, I was able to fit in the family with no problem. From then on I was known as Kurosaki Karin. Kurosaki Ichigo's younger sister, Kurosaki Yuzu's younger twin and Kurosaki Isshin's youngest daughter, even though technically I was the oldest out of the two children. Soon, I started to have a normal life as any human.

It lasted for years until one day I felt a familiar reiatsu at the house. It was the reiatsu of someone that I haven't seen for years. It was Rukia, she was in my brother's room. Apart from that I also felt the reiatsu of a hollow. I really wanted to leave the gigai and kill it but I couldn't let people know about me. Rukia would recognize me in seconds if I'm out. So I pretended to be defenceless and let the hollow take me. Yuzu saw this so she quickly ran to Ichigo's room. Ichigo and Rukia came out of the house and they saw me. I glanced at them for any reactions. Ichigo was worried, while Rukia was shocked for a second before turning serious. She must have recognized me, but I was thankful that she didn't say anything and went to save me. Later that night, I saw her transferred her powers to Ichigo and he became a shinigami.

It was that same night when I talked to one of my friends for the first time after so long. I abandoned my gigai as well in order to help her clean up the mess. I replaced Yuzu's memories then helped Ichigo into his body and placed him in bed then Rukia and I talked about all the things I missed.

* * *

_"I can't believe you are alive Karin. I'm so glad!" She said hugging me._

_I laughed nervously. "Yeah, I'm sorry for disappearing. I found my father so, in the end, I decided to stay with him and his family instead," I explained._

_"I see, so Captain Shiba isn't dead either?"_

_"Yeah, something really complicated happened. But anyway, what are you going to do now? You and I both know that what you did was forbidden."_

_She sighed, "I don't know yet. Let's just hope my powers come back before my mission here ends, or else I'll bring trouble."_

_"I'll see what I can do."_

_She smiled. "You don't have to Karin, and after all, you also broke a law. At least for Soul Society, you are dead now. I'm sure it will turn out okay."_

_"Alright then, but tell me what I missed!"_

_"Nothing much really. Everyone is almost the same. Renji got your position recently. Hinamori-san and Kira-san became lieutenants of the 5th and 3rd a little while after you left."_

_"What about the 10th?" I asked nervously._

_"They seemed fine. The third seat became captain after Captain Shiba left. Matsumoto-san is still the lieutenant. Personally I've never met the new captain before, I just know that Captain Hitsugaya is a child prodigy." She paused then gave me a sad smile, "Karin, you miss them don't you?" She asked. I once told her that the 10th was like my family._

_"Yeah, I feel horrible because I broke a promise before I left, I promised that I'd bring their captain back… but I didn't."_

_"Don't worry about it. Karin, I talked to Matsumoto-san, and do you know what she told me?" I didn't say anything so she continued, "she said that both she and her captain regretted not stopping you that day. They think that you are dead. What I'm trying to say is Karin. I don't think they'll be mad at you."_

_"But I… abandoned them for so many years."_

* * *

After that night, it felt like I was being consumed by my guilt. I thought about my friends, my family. The ones that I abandoned behind. My father told me that it was alright to feel guilty, he understood me because he did the same. When I told him that I wanted to go back and meet everyone, he said that it wasn't the time. So, in the end, we continued being in the dark, watching Ichigo's every move as he became stronger day by day.

I knew when they took Rukia away. I felt Renji and my old captain's reiatsu. That night I didn't sleep, I couldn't sleep, I was worried about Rukia. I knew what was going to happen to her, she was going to be executed. Because giving shinigami powers to humans is a huge crime.

Then Ichigo started disappearing more. I knew that was because he went to Soul Society to save Rukia, I wanted to go too, but my father stopped me. I could still remember the serious conversation we had that night when Yuzu was asleep.

* * *

_"Why can't I go with them? Rukia is my friend too." I couldn't help but feel guilty about this. If that night I had used my powers to kill the monster, they would never be in that situation._

_"I know Karin-chan… but you have to remember that we are criminals too, you can't just go and show yourself to Soul Society. It is too dangerous for us."_

_"But, it was my fault too that they are in this situation. If I had used my powers to kill the hollow then Rukia wouldn't have to give her powers to Ichigo, therefore he didn't have to be a shinigami and risk his life for us."_

_"Believe in him. You and I both know that he would become a shinigami someday. Maybe he did sooner than we expected but I have a feeling that he'll be fine, besides, don't worry about it, Yoruichi-san is with them."_

_I sighed "since when are you so serious about something? Captain Shiba?" I joked._

_"Karin-chan! That's mean."_

_"You know… this really reminds me of the old times, we used to sit and enjoy tea while we talked about different things. But back then Toshiro and Matsumoto-san were always with us. I really miss them, don't you father?"_

_His eyes softened, "I do Karin, I do. But we made our choices. And Karin remembers one thing. Don't show yourself now, it's not the right time." I could tell that he was completely serious because he didn't call me "Karin-chan" so I nodded._

_"I get it already."_

* * *

Ichigo came back after a while. Yuzu had been worried sick about him. Sometimes I'd hear her cry to sleep at other times she'd cook an extra plate of food for Ichigo if he comes back. I was worried but not that much because I knew where he was and what he was doing. I heard news from Urahara about what had been happening in Soul Society. Apparently 3 captains betrayed Soul Society, one of them was Aizen, the captain of the 5th. Back when I was still in Soul Society, he was the person that Hinamori admired the most. She wanted to be in his division because of that. I couldn't imagine how badly that must have affected her. From what I've read, there was going to be a war soon, and I hoped that Ichigo wouldn't have to be part of it.

However, unfortunately, Ichigo did get involved. One day, I tried to confront him about him being a shinigami. I went to his room and told him about it. He called me crazy then quickly left after a high reiatsu appeared out of nowhere. When he left his room, my eyes widened at the level of reiatsu. Ichigo stood no chance against that… I was about to go, leave my gigai and follow him when a hand stopped me. It was my father. Then I calmed down waiting for my brother to come back.

I soon felt some familiar reiatsu in town. Some of my best friends were here, Toshiro… Renji, Matsumoto-san, Rukia. They were in Ichigo's room. I had always been good at hiding my reiatsu so I wasn't afraid that they'd discover me. But still, I was glad that the only person staying at our house was Rukia. She was the only one who knew about me and my father. She explained to me the best she could about the situation and told me that the people who appeared were Arrancars. I've heard about them but never thought they were real.

One night, several strong reiatsu appeared in Karakura. That night I left my gigai and hid well as I watched the fight. I saw them getting heavily injured but they were able to win in the end after the limiter got released. That night I saw Toshiro's bankai after so long. I could still remember the first time I saw it. I was the first person he showed it to back when he was training.

After that battle, Ichigo disappeared once again, this time even Rukia didn't know where he was. It was around then when the winter war started. Father decided to show himself to Ichigo because he thought that it was the time for it. I wanted too but I couldn't. I couldn't leave Yuzu defenceless alone while a strong enemy was out there. So, in the end, I stayed behind protecting Yuzu. My reunion with my friends had to wait.

The shinigami won, but at the cause of Ichigo's powers. For 2 years he became a normal human once again with no abilities to see the dead like he used to. Part of me felt bad for him. But another part of me was glad that he lost his powers. Because that way he was finally able to live a normal human life, the life that he deserved. But the other part of me felt bad for him because, during that time he seemed so sad, he wasn't like himself. I really wanted to give my powers to him but my father stopped me. And of course, once Ichigo's reiatsu disappeared. Mine started to grow in the family. I was afraid that I could get discovered so I went to Urahara's to buy products that could help me deal with hollows without using my powers. As Ichigo lost his powers, the shinigamis stopped coming as well. At first, Rukia visited me once a while. But she soon stopped coming once she became the lieutenant of the 13th.

Ichigo was miserable without his powers so he looked for anything that could give him his powers back. I learned from Urahara that he got involved in a group of fullbringers called the X-cution or something like that. They were helping Ichigo to gain back his powers. I did a little bit of my own research and realised their real motives. When I talked to my father about this, he just smiled at me and told me to not worry about it because Soul Society was already going to get involved, and they were trying to give Ichigo's powers back to him.

One of the enemies knew how to replace memories so he replaced everyone's memories, I didn't let him attack me because he didn't know about my existence. I was perfectly aware of everything that was going on, but I pretended to not know as I lied to Ichigo, I felt horrible as I watched Ichigo suffer like that. But I couldn't let myself known. Later when the shinigamis showed up father and Urahara-san put everyone to sleep, I created a barrier around us to protect them and I sat down next to Yuzu pretending to be asleep too, while I watched what was going on. That night I saw my friends again, they changed a lot. Especially Toshiro. The new-look made him look older so I wondered whether he was still sensitive about his height or not. Watching them there I really hope that I could talk with all of them once again someday.

Soon after that incident, Soul Society was in trouble once again, from what I heard this time the enemies were a lot stronger than the ones they faced before. They were fighting against the Quincy. I heard some different rumours about the situation of Soul Society and apparently I might be needed in the battlefield. I could still remember that man who appeared in Karakura. He was about to steal Ichigo's bankai when I interrupted. I could see Ichigo's shocked expression when he saw me there dressed in shihakusho holding a zanpakuto against the Quincy.

* * *

_"Karin?! What are you doing here?" Ichigo asked shocked, "get away from him!"_

_"No Ichigo, you are the one who should get away," I said seriously as I blocked the guy's attack._

_"When…" I cut him off, "this is not the time, go inside and protect Yuzu. Go now!" He finally left and I was able to finish the fight. The Quincy was originally there to take Ichigo's bankai. But since he didn't know about me, I was able to kill him without using bankai. After the fight, I quickly returned to my gigai and walked into Ichigo's room as if nothing happened._

_He dismissed the other shinigamis in the room. "Karin… since when, why…? Did Urahara…?" He didn't know what to ask._

_"No, Ichigo, I have always been a shinigami," I said seriously._

_"What do you mean? I saw you as a baby."_

_"What you saw weren't real Ichigo. I'm not really your sister, we are not blood-related. The truth is, I'm adopted by your father even before he came to the human world. You already know that father is a shinigami. So accept it, I'm a shinigami too," I said._

_"Then you know about the old man's secrets? And you know what I have been doing?"_

_I nodded. "Yes, I'm aware of what you've been doing. And I know his secrets too, but it is not my place to tell you." I paused a little, "listen Ichigo, that man. There will be people stronger than him. I want you to be careful. Because they take away our bankai. That man the only reason came today is to take away your bankai. "How do you know?"_

_"Take away my bankai?"_

_"Yes, even though I'm not really sure how they do it, but when they steal it, you'll have to get it back from square one. That's why I want you to be careful."_

"_How do you know?"_

_"I have my ways Ichigo, if I'm correct there might be another war going on soon, against an old enemy of Soul Society. I assume you are familiar with the term Quincy? Considering one of your friends Ishida Uryu is one."_

_"Yes, what does that have to do with anything?"_

_"That man was a Quincy. And that's all I'm able to tell you. You will understand it sooner or later anyways because father is going to tell his story to you."_

A little while after the first appearance of the Quincy in Karakura, Ichigo left to Soul Society once again because they needed him. From what I heard, things were going rather bad. Head Captain Yamamoto died fighting the leader but it was in vain. So did his lieutenant, and Captain Kyoraku become the next Head Captain.

Ichigo did come back for answers and father explained everything to him. I was there as I listened to them, then I decided that I really wanted to go back and help them so I entered Soul Society for the first time after so many years. Soul Society was what I once called home, it was where I grew up and became a shinigami I was, where my best friends were. I felt so many familiar reiatsu fighting, I went over to something that got my attention.

* * *

_"What the hell is that thing?" I asked._

_"He must be a Quincy too, if you want to go there go, Karin," father said._

_"Alright, good luck to you guys too." I waved then flash stepped away._

_I tensed when I felt 3 familiar reiatsu, one was huge, two other more controlled. Toshiro, Captain Kuchiki and Captain Zaraki. They were fighting that monster. Toshiro was in his bankai, he and my old captain were standing on the top of a collapsed building, as they watched what assumed to be Captain Zaraki's fight._

_They must have felt me and they turned around. Their eyes widened at the sight of me._

_"Shiba Karin," Captain Kuchiki said._

_"Karin…?" Toshiro said shocked._

_I smiled awkwardly. "Yeah, that's me… well, its Kurosaki Karin now I guess…" I said._

_"Kurosaki?"_

_"Yeah. It's a long story, but I don't think it is the moment to talk about that now," I said seriously as I saw what was in front of us. "So what the hell is that thing?" I asked._

_"Gerard Valkyrie. Apparently he gets stronger every time he gets attacked. Zaraki is down there fighting him," Toshiro explained. He sounded the same._

_"Um… So pretty much immortal then?"_

"_Yes, it would be best in mind we provide assistance to each other," I nodded, agreeing with Captain Kuchiki._

"_Although if I stood on top of you we'd still be well short of reaching the top of that summit." Toshiro joked - wait what?!_

_I gasped right at that moment, not believing what I just heard._

"_Did you… Just made a height joke?" Still, find it unbelievable. _

_He turned his head and that confirmed it. I burst out laughing so hard that my sides start killing me, and Captain Kuchiki stood there with a blank face, not saying anything. Never once in my life thought he would make a height joke. Wished I could have recorded this. I guess he doesn't have a height complex anymore. _

_I could tell Toshiro was unsure whether he should tell Captain Kuchiki at least give him a pity laugh or tell me to stop laughing. I almost felt bad when I saw how red his face. Luckily, he didn't have to choose__ because a great impact was coming toward us. We dodged it but Toshiro didn't dodge in time._

_"Toshiro!" I yelled._

_"Captain Hitsugaya, you should deactivate your bankai," Captain Kuchiki said._

_"Is fine." We couldn't see because of the smoke but we could tell he was fine. But for some reason, his voice was way deeper than before. My eyes widened at his new form. He aged. He no longer looked like a teenager but an actual adult. __**Handsome adult**__. __My brain went malfunction when I saw his full maturity bankai at a front-row seat. Oh my god… I can see his chest. __**His abs.**__ My face went up flamed at the sight of it. What's wrong with me?! Now, it isn't the time to be fantasizing- I-I mean flustered by your best friend's new look when there is a giant immortal Quincy who needs to be taken down. Never once in my life, I have ever felt so embarrassed. I was still in my chaotic thoughts until my captain pulled me out and brought me back to reality._

* * *

I saw my captain and Toshiro jumped into the fight, I joined the fight as well and activated my bankai even though I didn't like using it in front of other people. Our enemy was immortal, he became so much stronger after all of our attacks. While we were fighting that giant monster, I felt Renji and Rukia's reiatsu nearby, running towards us. I looked over to them to see they don't have any life-threatening injuries. I sighed in relief inwardly, glad they are okay. Toshiro also seemed to notice them as well, I heard he warned them to tread carefully because this immortal is much more than a monster.

I noticed they had a confused look as if they didn't understand what he said. Did something happen?

"Wh-Who the hell is that?!" Renji asked. Oh, I see, they don't recognise this is Toshiro.

"Clearly it is Captain Hitsugaya's big brother!" I accidentally let my laugh escaped and I know Toshiro heard it because he glared at me. I held my laugh in, trying to contain myself from laughing out loud. But it's too difficult to do the task. This is the hardest challenge.

"Oh! Quick thinking! Pleased to meet you!" Another one escaped. I averted my eyes to hide from his glare.

"Y...Yes, it's an honor to finally meet both of you!" He is not even gonna try.

"Karin-chan! What's wrong? Are you hurt?" Rukia asked with a concerned look. She saw me on my knee holding my side and had my mouth covered, misunderstood thought I had a serious injury, not holding in my laugh.

"N-No I-I'm okay. J-just go meet up Ichigo." I struggled to keep my laughter seal tight as ordering them.

"Okay!" They obeyed my order and quickly went to the direction of Ichigo. When they were out of the range, I instantly let go and started rolling around on the ground as laughing. Not caring one bit where I am or we are still in the middle of the battle. I continued laughing ignoring the pain from the sides and tears coming out. I couldn't see Toshiro's face but I can tell he is glaring at me harshly that I can feel the temperature has dropped down.

After a few minutes, I finally calmed down and the temperature went back to normal. We were about to get into our fighting stance, but fortunately he was taken down mysteriously and only found out later that it was because of Ichigo. So Soul Society was victorious once again, thanks to him.

And of course, the war ended and naturally it was time to face everything. My father and I explained everything to the head Captain. We were forgiven because we helped in this war. The head Captain even asked us to stay. But we declined, Yuzu was still part of the living and she was important to us so we agreed that someday we'd come back and work for the Gotei again. That didn't mean that we wouldn't visit our friends there in Soul Society.

Speaking of friends, we also faced Toshiro and Matsumoto-san after so long. They were happy that we came back. And they welcomed us back with open arms. At least Matsumoto-san hugged us.

Toshiro and I talked once the others went to drink. We were sitting in the garden, the same place where we used to sit and I apologized to him.

_"Toshiro, I'm sorry I left without saying anything."_

_"Is fine. I kind of understand why you did that. Even if it hurts to think about it, I understand why you'd want to follow him. I'm just glad that you are not dead." He said softly._

_"You've changed quite a lot, haven't you Captain Hitsugaya," I winked._

_"Do I have a choice? I need to make sure people actually take me seriously. Of all the captains I'm the weakest, heck even you are stronger than me."_

_I laughed, "stop with that, I have seen what you are able to do. And remember even if you are the weakest, you are also the youngest captain in history. There is so long ahead of you to improve, so don't feel down."_

_"I bet if you haven't left you might have become the captain of the 10th division."_

_"Well I might, but I didn't and you have, so stop complaining and be the good captain that you need to be." I slapped his back like old times and he smiled._

_"Thanks, Karin, I don't know how you do it, you always cheer me up."_

_"Now, now. That's what best friends are for. Don't you dare go sentimental on me Hitsugaya," he decided not to speak so I did, "you know, I was afraid that you might not forgive me for leaving so many years ago. I was nervous you know? But now it sure feels great to know that everything is alright between us. Of all the people I left behind, you are the one I missed the most Toshiro." I admitted with a smile._

_"When a friendship is strong I don't think it could be broken so easily, I was sad that you and Captain Shiba left. But I guess I can't live in the past, you both have your reasons for what you did and I can't be the one to judge because I think if I were you, I'd do the same."_

_"Thanks, Toshiro, that means a lot to me. And I'm sure the old man will say the same thing."_

* * *

That night we sorted everything out in Soul Society so we could go back and act as nothing happened. Yuzu was staying at a friend's house so she wasn't alone at home. When we came back, everything went back to how we were before Ichigo became a shinigami. He went to college and since I was a Shinigami, I became the one who took care of Karakura.

A little while I was invited to Rukia and Renji's engagement party. Ichigo and his friends were there and so were my closest friends. I found out that Hinamori-san was happily dating Kira-san. They were able to help each other out after the whole Aizen business. After hearing what Toshiro told me about what happened, they deserve to be happy.

Ichigo's friends were all surprised to see me there talking so familiarly with all the people there because they didn't know that I knew those people way longer than any of them. Thankfully Ichigo explained everything to them so I didn't have to.

* * *

_"So Karin-chan, what about you?" Matsumoto-san asked. She was drunk already._

_"About what?" I asked confused drinking a little bit if the sake inside my cup. Toshiro said that he was going to try and the others told me to drink too._

_"Even Renji is getting married, Hinamori-san is dating someone. Ichigo is dating Orihime-chan, what about you? Any boyfriend?"_

_"No, and it's none of your business," I said seriously._

_"Oh too bad, you should get yourself, someone! Karin-chan!"_

_"You are drunk Matsumoto," Toshiro said._

_"Captain! That's right, Captain should be your boyfriend!"_

_"What?!" Both of us said at the same time._

_Matsumoto never answered as she passed out on the table. Leaving us there feeling quite awkward as everyone else were all drunk._

_"I can't believe it," Toshiro sounded really annoyed._

_I laughed. "Leave them be Toshiro, they are just happy, the war is over and we won. Don't you think that it is time to celebrate?"_

_"They already partied none stop for days."_

_"Yeah I know, but can you blame them? We have all been through so much, they all deserve this much. This is proof that we survived another day."_

_He sighed, "maybe you are right."_

* * *

Nothing much has changed since that day, and I must say I was happy that everything turned out well when Ichigo and Orihime finished collage they decided to get married. After they got married, Ichigo started to have a normal human life, even still with his powers, he wasn't active like before, so I became one who protected Karakura. I was not complaining, in fact, I was happy that he was living a normal life because he was going to be a father soon. Besides Soul Society was never Ichigo's problem, to begin with, we are already so thankful for him for all the stuff he did.

As for me… well, one or two years is nothing. I haven't grown anything, at least in my true form. Of course ever since my decision to stay in the human world, I had to make sure I grow up normally like a human because Yuzu doesn't know my secrets. That's right I'm still lying to her. So in this gigai Urahara made for me I "grow up" like any human.

I don't regret this decision. Even though it means that I wouldn't be close to my friends in Soul Society, I get to spend my time with family, that's something I have always wanted. Not to say that Matsumoto-san and Toshiro aren't my family. But I feel like this is different. Besides, it was not like I can never see them or anything, I can go visit them anytime I want.

In fact, sometimes they sent me invitations to parties so I could go see them. I remember every single one of them. Times where Matsumoto-san invited me to drink with her and her friends. Of course, I always refused at first but ended up drinking anyway.

* * *

_"Karin-chan! Come drink with us," Matsumoto-san said holding an empty sake bottle._

"_Matsumoto-san! I already told you that I don't like sake," I said, trying to get away from there._

_"It's alright Shiba. You can have so much fun!" Someone else I used to know said._

_"This isn't exactly my definition of fun…" I said but was ignored as Matsumoto-san pulled me towards her and wrapped one of her arms around my neck preventing me from leaving._

_"You sound like Captain!" She laughed._

* * *

In the end, I had no idea how but I ended up drinking with them. Some of them said that I danced on the table when I was drunk the day afterwards.

Or times when Rukia invite me to her house. She showed me her drawing, in my opinion, they are still as bad as always but unlike Ichigo, I never said anything so she wouldn't hit me. When I told her how cool those drawings were, she always laughed and modestly said that her brother was a lot better than her.

Man, I was not surprised at all when I realised that my captain was still obsessed with that weird green thing he called Ambassador Seaweed.

* * *

_Rukia blushed, "oh Karin-chan, you haven't seen any of the masterpieces my Nii-sama made yet. He's so good and talented."_

_"Is he still obsessed with that stupid green creature? What was its name again?"_

_"Don't call Ambassador Seaweed stupid." I rolled my eyes not surprised at all._

_"Rukia, you must remember that I have been his lieutenant for quite a while. I don't know how Renji deal with it, but sometimes it's exhausting" I laughed. Of course even if sometimes it is annoying, I was still really grateful for him. Because he helped me become the person I am today._

_"Speaking about that. You've never told me how you became his lieutenant."_

_I placed a finger in front of my lips and winked at her. "Oh, that's a secret" of course that will be a story for another time._

* * *

Before I could get deeper in my thoughts, a sudden familiar reiatsu broke my train of thoughts. I looked over to my sister's bed to make sure that she was deep asleep before I got out of my bed and walked out of the room of our shared apartment. It was quite small but enough for two college students.

Before going out I took a jacket with me then walked outside to where that reiatsu was.

And there he was sitting on the railings near my "childhood home". He once told me that in Karakura, that place was his favourite, because he could see the sunset. Because it brings back memories of his childhood before Hinamori left to be a shinigami. He was also in a gigai, and he was playing with his phone.

"Is it okay to leak your reiatsu like that?" I asked approaching him.

"I wasn't leaking anything. You were always good to feel my presence." He answered without looking back. He must know that I was coming.

"I know, so how have you been? We haven't talked that much lately." I asked sitting beside him on the railings. He closed his phone and placed it in his pocket. I looked at him, unlike me, who physically looks like an adult, he still looked like a child. It didn't bother me because my true form is no different than his. But maybe if I was actually a human this would be a problem.

But of course… if I was human maybe we'd never even meet in the first place.

"I have been fine, a little busy lately because we have new recruits coming to the 10th. Apart from that, there is nothing new," he said. At the moment I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I was usually good at reading him. Was something wrong? "What about you? How is your human life? Are you regretting it?"

"Ah well," I moved my eyes away from him, and I looked at the night sky instead. It was late. Midnight to be exact, sometimes I couldn't sleep so I stayed in bed thinking about things. "My life now is very normal, at least as normal as any human my age. I don't exactly regret this decision if I did I'd be back sooner. After all, I'm sure they will accept me back and make me a captain. Because I'm stronger than you after all. Third seat Hitsugaya," I teased hitting his side with my elbow.

"It's Captain Hitsugaya now," he said coldly. Anyone would be shivering in fear by that tone. But I simply laughed.

"I know that Toshiro, I know. But anyway, jokes aside, I don't regret at all. I can't just disappear on Yuzu, she doesn't know anything, and I can't just tell her that I'm not her real sister and that all her life is just a lie." I sighed. "Even if I don't really belong here…" I paused thinking about what I really wanted to say. "I think I'm a selfish person Toshiro, the reason why I don't want to tell Yuzu is that I'm afraid of what she would say to me afterwards. I'm afraid of what our relationship will be after I tell her that all this time I wasn't her twin, that when Masaki-san died I wasn't even there for her and Ichigo. I really am a horrible person am I?"

"You are not a bad person, there is a reason why you never told her anything. She can't see us. Telling her would only unnecessarily involve her into our world, she's just like any normal human, and it is not selfish when you want to protect someone. Besides you stayed, you stayed for her sake."

True, Yuzu did have a normal human life. She wasn't like me who's somewhat in the middle, I'm a shinigami, a soul living a human life but doing shinigami duties at the same time. She wouldn't really understand anything. And I'd put her in danger if I told her things that don't even involve her.

"You are right, she doesn't have to know, because even though she deserves the truth, she isn't involved in any of this yet."

"That's the reason why Kurosaki knew but he never said anything. You told me that when he came back from the war, he acted as if nothing has changed. But he knows about your secret."

"I'm grateful that Ichigo is still treating me like I was actually his little sister even after knowing every lie we told him. Oh, I guess I'm technically the older sister now."

"I'm sure he understands."

"Ichigo is someone who usually hides his feelings. At least, he had been like that for a while after Masaki-san died."

"Was he? But he has given me some advice before."

"What he tells to others has nothing to do with what he act alone," I smiled softly.

"Alright then, but anyways we are talking about you. Are you happy in this life?" He asked.

"I am. I have everything I want now. I have a family, I have my best friends and life is easy. But sometimes I miss my old life, I miss being a lieutenant, I miss visiting you, Matsumoto-san and my father at the 10th. I miss having tea with Rukia and Captain Kuchiki every day, I also miss training with you and my other friends…" I sighed.

"I think you made the right choice, a human's life is short compared to us. It is not like you'll be here forever." He paused looking at me with intense eyes that held intense emotions I couldn't read. I have never seen him looking at me like that. "Karin I waited for you for a long time, the lifetime of a human is nothing. Not only me, everyone else thought you were dead. At least, I know this time you are not dead and that I would be able to see you once a while." And I have never heard him use this tone before either, it was something new and I didn't like it, it makes me feel even more guilty for what I did.

"Toshiro…" I mumbled.

"I don't mind waiting for you." He turned away from me after noticing my change. He knew that I felt guilty. "It's alright, I understand your situation. Like I said before, I'd do the same if I were in your shoes." He assured.

I raised my head and smiled softly "I remember you saying that I can always cheer you up, I guess now it's your turn to cheer me up." I said.

"Of course."

For a while, we stayed silent. I didn't mind, his presence was enough to make me feel better, we were never so talkative either. We always had different ways to communicate with each other, but I decided to break the ice anyways.

"Yuzu got herself a boyfriend just the other day, he's in the same class as her. I've only met him once but I think he's a good match for Yuzu." I told him.

"That's good for hear and what about you? You do know that any relationship with a human is forbidden." He said seriously.

"Of course I know that! I'm not going to do what my father did. But that's the problem… at this rate, I'll die as a virgin." I complained.

I saw him blush slightly at my comment and I blushed too after I realised what I just said in front of him.

"If it makes you feel better I'm a virgin too," he mumbled, I could tell that he didn't want me to hear that but I still did.

"But that's different, you look like a kid, but now I have the body of an adult!" I said trying not to feel awkward with the conversation.

"I'm not a kid. And this is just your gigai, it's not even your real body. Besides Karin, we are already dead. So you can't "die" as a virgin."

"Well thank you for stating the obvious, I know I'm already dead, but I am going to die again. And why are we talking about this anyway?!"

"You started." He said indifferently.

"Alright but really, what am I supposed to do? I still have a life ahead of me in the human world. Normal humans grow up, have relationships, get married, and start families or whatever but what should I do? Yuzu is already curious to why I never go out with anyone. I can't keep my cover for long if that's the case. Man, I really should have thought this through when I made my decision."

"If you don't mind, I can get gigai like yours too," he suggested.

"You would?" During my desperate state, I wasn't aware of what he just implied.

"I don't mind spending my free time with you," it was when he blushed again I realised what he just implied.

"Thank you Toshiro, you just saved me big time." When we talked we never realise the time that flies. It was already morning.

"Shit! It's morning already?! Yuzu is going to wake up any second from now. Sorry Toshiro but I have to go!" I gave him a small hug which was quite awkward as I was physically bigger than him. He waved goodbye and I ran away.

Maybe another reason why I decided to leave was because of the awkwardness of that situation. But thinking about it, I really don't mind spending more time with him either… but whatever it is, I'm sure my human life will be a lot better with him in my life.


End file.
